Learning to enjoy the gap.
It’s natural to have strong desires for what we want in life: great friendships, fruitful social lives, a loving relationship, expanding careers, the list goes on. Each desire we have is a divine right for us to enjoy and experience, but so often, when we focus on what it is we want, we end up focusing on what’s missing from our lives rather than what's already abundantly present. If what we want is currently not present, it can end up feeling like we’ve been left behind, or forgotten.
Like the feeling of the bus that never picked you up.
It can start to feel like our sheer craving for something is a signal that it's out of reach, seen to be possible for others but somehow not for us. We become acutely aware of those around us that seem to effortlessly have what it is we desire so much. Our focus shifts into acknowledging all of the shortcomings in our lives and we can begin to embody an energy of jealousy and lack.
It’s not an attempt to make ourselves feel terrible, but it's impossible to sustain a great mood and appreciation for our lives when we have trained ourselves to notice everything that doesn't measure up to how we’d like it to.
If you're facing a great inbetween -- the gap between what you have, and what you so honestly crave, please take solace. You are not alone. Its absence does not signal that you are flawed or unworthy.
This time in your life is, as it always has, and always will -- is teaching you -- shaping you into who you are here to be. There is always going to be a gap between what we have and what we want. We’ve got to make peace with this truth and allow it to be a transition, rather than our destination. As soon as you have what you want, your desires will spring forth once again and create the space between what you have and what you want. Think to yourself for a moment about something you have in your life now that you once so desperately craved. Isn't it fascinating that as soon as we attain it, our focus almost immediately jumps to what we’d like next?
This process is what keeps us moving forward and growing in our lives. Although delays never feel great, they teach us a great deal about ourselves. In the gap between what was and and what will be, there you are.
When you shift your energy and attention back to what is in front of your two feet -- you can start to see the little clues that lead you to what it is you desire.
By showing up more fully now to what is already present in your life, you take the pressure off your shoulders to make it anything else other than what it is. It won’t be this way forever -- it never has. You will get to where you wish to go, but you have to be here now to get there.
REMINDERS FOR THE GAP BETWEEN WHAT YOU HAVE AND WHAT YOU WANT:
Shift your focus from what's missing to what's abundantly present in your life
Let go of the specifics. Allow life to surprise and delight you on exactly how things will unfold.
The current absence of what you want does not mean you are unworthy
Trust that what you desire is already on its way to you
Bring your attention to this present moment. To the fullness of your presence within it. When you are here, with this day, you will start to notice the clues that light you up and lead you to what you want.