How to *actually* break free of old patterns
Something that a lot of coaching consulting calls have brought up this week is a frustration that they know what it is that has been holding them back, “I know that it's coming from limiting beliefs, but I don't know how to change them..”.
Time and time again they find themselves in the same emotionally unavailable dynamic, or believing the limiting thoughts that tell them they are not capable to take action towards that idea they've been wanting to bring to life.
Sometimes you get sick and tired of seeing the same pattern pop up..
Knowledge is one thing. We can read a hundred books that explain in detail that our past experiences have shaped what we believe to be possible for us. But it is only in the embodiment of that knowledge and taking NEW action that truly creates the change we are seeking.
So how do we go from the overthinking and underacting, to the embodied woman?
The first place we have to start is -- nervous system regulation.
This looks like integrating a practice that helps us to break out of fight / flight / freeze response when a stressful situation arises. Because until we can self-regulate and feel safe in our body, our nervous system will continue to hold us in the same familiar (yet restrictive) circumstances.
When our nervous system is dysregulated, (and yes this can be triggered by not getting a text back, or seeing someone else achieve what it is you want on social media), our emotions flare up, and the part of our brain responsible for reasoning, decision making and self soothing is impaired.
Yes that's the reason why your heart starts racing and your palms start sweating when faced with confrontation. That's our brain assuming that this could be a life or death situation (thanks brain), flooding your system with cortisol and shutting down the very part of your brain that's most capable to handle the situation.
So what do we do to regulate? You can start right now while reading this email. Take a deep breath in through the nose, and for your exhale -- make an audible humming sound. Repeat 3 times. Notice the shift in your body.
Integrating a custom & simple regulation practice is something that is the first step I take with every client I work with. It's also something I build into every guided meditation on the Magnetic app -- because it has had the MOST impact of the ability of my clients to attain what it is they desire most.
Without regulation, we tend to take three steps forward (then panic in the unfamiliar space) only to take two steps backwards.
With the right nervous system support, we can take gradual steps forward, expanding our capacity to handle the challenges that inevitably arise when building out your vision. No more panic, and so much more energy to take aligned action.
It's the needle mover when it comes to choosing to respond in new ways, giving you the capacity to show up in alignment with your highest self, rather than staying trapped in old habitual reactions.
Try it this week and let me know how you find it.
As always sending love. X
Amber