Feeling lost in limbo? Here's how to find answers

Feeling lost in limbo? Here's how to find answers

I think at some point or another everyone can relate to feeling like we are in limbo. Not knowing where we are going and not quite happy with where things are right now. I'm not sure about you but even the word 'limbo' feels like the perfect visual summary for the sensation - floating in a void.

It's a feeling where nothing quite lands, nothing means as much as it used to and we've lost touch with the magic of life. This is NORMAL. In fact these times of confusion are crucial to realign us to where we are supposed to be. Sometimes we detour off our track and these little episodes help nudge us back in the right direction.

When I first moved to New York for modelling I was wide eyed and majorly idealistic. I had a small inkling that it wasn't what I wanted to spend my life doing but I had grown up idealising the beautiful faces spread across magazines. I was pursuing it because I thought it would make me happy rather than doing something that actually cultivated joy organically. The more I mindlessly chased each success the more hollow and empty I began to feel. Totally disconnected from who I was and what actually brought me joy. I remember not understanding how I got to this place and having no idea how to get out. 

If you are feeling lost, firstly - accept yourself for how you are feeling. It's ok not having all of the answers, the truth is everyone is figuring it out as they go. Once you have shown yourself patience & love despite how you are feeling, we can start to refocus. If you can bring yourself to a place of stillness - acknowledge that these emotions are trying to guide you to a place of alignment and joy. Just like car engine lights - our emotions can serve as an indicator of something that needs to be looked at internally. Ok, so now we know something needs repair (thank you emotions). 

This is when we can begin to reframe our thoughts around how we're feeling. Resist the urge to loop on thoughts like "I feel so lost", "I don't know what to do" and "I don't have any answers". When we are too attuned to the issue we end up blinding ourselves to all the solutions and opportunities radiating around us.

Affirm to yourself "I have all the answers I need, I allow them to surface" or "I am now open to creative solutions." Alternatively - call a trusted friend to chat in person, it may bring light to something you might not have been able to see by yourself. All of the above channels our energy towards movement and solutions rather than tangling us further into negative thought.

Another strategy is to write out your values. Ask yourself questions like: What have I always been naturally really good at? What do friends/family seek me out for help/ advice on? What could I do all day and be completely fulfilled? If these questions feel out of reach try a simple: whats one thing I could do today that makes me happy?

These questions help remind us of the things that bring us joy in life. The simplicity of building one thing into each day that feels good will do wonders - I promise. As you master adding one thing to your daily routine, try adding another, and another and another. It could be as simple as leaving a little early to work so that you can sit down to peacefully enjoy your coffee rather than getting it to go. (Ahh the bliss of a quiet start to the day..)

Often when we are feeling lost it is because our days are filled with things that actually don't make us happy. Maybe we pursued something that we thought would, and have discovered since that it doesn't. Or perhaps the needs of those around us have consumed our days. No matter the cause - the solutions the same: build back in things that bring you joy.

So if you’re feeling lost, or know someone who is, remember that you have all the answers you need, just be patient as they make their way to you. Start to make time for little things that bring you joy, and most of all - be kind to yourself, you are not alone and the feelings will pass.

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3 comments

Thank you for your posts! They are really helpful. I love to read you and specially this post is inspiring.

Elena

Much appreciated this post!
I was feeling a bit under the weather these days, internally. And I think this reading has been helpful to stop thinking about negative things and rather try to find solutions.
Thanks again.
Love, Ailen.

Ailen

I have so many takeaways from this post! Thank you so much for creating this type of content!

Yessica

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